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After checking in, we discussed our reading assignment, chapters 6-8 in Being a Brainwise Therapist by Bonnie Badenoch.  We covered a bit about how we therapists can call upon the inner community – in particular the internalization of parent-child pairs (neuroscience showing us how this works through the resonance circuits that link us with one another) as well as the mutuality of the therapeutic relationship and embracing shame.

Here are some of the neuroscience nuggets from our peer group:

• Before examining the inner community of a client – and the parent-child pairs that exist in their minds – identify the “wiser self” who can be able to observe and contain.
• The client can internalize the therapist as an additional “helpful observer” to work alongside the “wiser self” when outside of session.
• Parent-Child pairs can often be identified when clients reports shame in session at which point therapist can ask, “Who’s voice created that feeling?” or “Who’s voice is that?”
• Any time a memory comes up, there is a possiblity for rewiring – if there’s a safe container for it to be held.  If not, it can be experienced as re-traumatizing.
• The body is a powerful access route to implicit (unconscious) memories – observed in shifts in body language and client self-report.
• Mirror neurons are considered by some to be the “foundation of empathy” in that they act like a bridge between two people when they fire at the same time.  “I’m seeing you and feeling this.”
• The more therapists can pick up signals in their own bodies – and call attention, “Something just happened…can we stop and talk about it…” the more opportunities to uncover more material and increase empathetic bond with the client.
• When early shame is frequent, without repair, it can further reinforce to the person that they are defective.

There was a particularly powerful paragraph in the book about the impact of shame through the neuroscience lens - and the various defensive positions people take to protect against it.  We read this aloud in group – I will share it here:

“The result for the same-bearer is the same.  All empathic connectedness is blocked by the flood of dysregulated anger, the well of shame untouched and still wired to release defensive, hair-trigger rage again.  Others may defend differently, locking themselves away from the intensity of social interaction in the left hemisphere, or physically avoiding any kind of intimate human contact.  All result in a person in isolation with his or her worst enemy: the internal dyad of shaming parent-shamed child.”

This is powerful stuff.

Next group meets March 31st – and we’ve been assigned chapters 9 and 10.

If any therapists who know something about this subject would like to share their information “nuggets,” all the better!  Insights and links to additional resources are all welcome on the comment form below.

Lastly, check the “notify me of new comments” to be kept in the loop.

See the previous sessions: 

The Therapist Consultation Room: Empathic Failure, Adult Attachment Styles and Toxic Shame

The Therapist Consultation Room: Caring and Empathy in Relationships Rewires the Brain

The Therapist Consultation Room: Attachment and Neuroscience

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Lisa Brookes Kift is a psychotherapist and creator of Notes from a Therapist’s Chair: The Therapy and Counseling Blog; a feature of The Toolbox at LisaKiftTherapy.com.  To stay updated on the most recent therapy / therapist related posts subscribe to Notes from a Therapist’s Chair Blog RSS Feed.

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